Take a tip from Zen Buddhism.
In the western way of living, we pride ourselves on how much we can accomplish and what the accomplishment is depending on our values.
Many times in your circles of friends you will chat about how busy you are and how you have no time. Usually, the conversation goes like this:
Guy 1: What’s up man?
Guy 2: Nothing dude, just keeping busy. You?
Guy 1: Same, been working a lot. Also been working on the car and family’s in town. Been a little crazy.
Guy 2: Yeah I know what you mean. I’ve been doing designs for my indie t-shirt company, but work’s making me come in on Saturdays and between writing and the kids I have no time.
Guy 1: Yeah I feel ya, we went out yesterday and I am still hungover.
And you get the idea…
So here’s the tricky part. I’m going to share a tip with you taken from Zen Buddhism. The tricky part is that it’s up to you to figure out how to use it without becoming offended.
Both guys in the example above have a lot on their plates and no matter how much is going on in their lives their response is always, “Yeah I’ve been super busy you know, crazy busy.”
Many people in the western world believe that this is normal. In order to feel like part of society, you have to move like society and that means fast. Climb that ladder fast and do it in style. Because you graduated from college 2 years ago already and your buddies are already in management positions. Where are you? Aren’t you successful and productive? Do a coffee run because you have a big day! Did you take your dog to the vet and your clothes to the cleaners before noon? Good! Because you have lunch with your buddy and dinner and drinks tonight with some good friends. Make sure you get some gym time in.
Let’s face it. When we don’t have time, we aren’t making time. Sometimes we do all these things in a day and we are exhausted, busy, studying, working, working out, starting a business, hanging out, learning, improving.
Countless hours spent on the internet rabbit-holing about the history of beer or gluten free pasta, carnivorous plants or the origins of a cat’s meow. Before you know it, you can hold your own with a botanist and order a beer that you can identify all the ingredients and their historical origins and impress your drinking buddies.
Here’s the tricky part. Is this bad or good?
Well, it depends. It depends on you. It depends on your priorities and being able to concentrate on one or a few things at once. But we of western minds have a hard time with this.
Many people have told me this: “You can’t have it all.”
Do I listen to them?
No.
I disagree. So I tell you this.
You CAN have it all. You feel happiness in your ambitions and drive and accomplishments. Many of them. Go for it. Be a well-traveled, brewer, bonanist, wildlife protecting black belt, photographer who can identify the subtle language of cats. Who cares whatever. Are you happy?
If yes, then awesome.
My reality that I want to share with you is this:
“You CAN have it all but not at the same time.”
But usually, you are spinning wheels, feeling tired and busy all the time but really accomplishing and finishing what? What happiness are you bringing? Life seems to be an endless treadmill, but damn that treadmill is fast. Let’s simplify.
If you have 20 different hobbies, 1-2 jobs, 56 ideas for startups and way too many friends in person, (let’s not even get into the several hundred/ thousand plus on Facebook).
Time to pick a few and stick with a few. How do you know which ones those are? How to choose? How many? What’s important? What you want? Discipline? Ugghh..
Haha ok let’s start:
Track your days down to the hour and figure out what you spend your time on.
Take your time because this is important. The important things are what your time is for.
Just do it.
See where you can change little things so that they align.
The thing you love to do or want to dedicate the most time to. For some of you, this may be 2 different things. You love jujitsu but you spend most of your time at work. If you love your work awesome, we are on the right track if not, I recommend you find out how to live what you love.
Try for 2 but if you are having a really hard time, then 3.
When choosing, do not worry about what people think are worthy goals. If you love raising birds or gardening, let that be your thing. You can do anything!!
Simplify, Focus!
When faced with a decision ask yourself how this brings you closer to your goals.
Seriously this is the hard part. Don’t do anything for a certain amount of time. Just sit there, be, relax, enjoy, be aware.
Your brain needs a break once in a while, just like your body needs a break, so allow it. When you give your brain a break it will work better for you.
A plan this tight will be close to impossible to sustain without breaking in the long run. So what do you do?
You break it first. You design distractions into your plan. It takes the pressure off and reminds you that you are human and yes, you are allowed to slack off a bit to balance this epic life you’re building.
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