Do you like it rough?
Life.
Do you like life rough?
If you’re a bit confused by what I mean here and a little bit distracted thinking about sex, let me explain.
Most people want to be successful. It is a natural instinct of humans to want to grow and achieve. To win. To conquer.
If you ask most people if they prefer encountering challenges, roadblocks, fear and obstacles to success or if they want an easy win to something they really, really want, most would say, “Gimme the easy win.”
For example, you have an idea for a business selling hats. (Yes, hats. Just stay with me here.)
Would you rather:
A. Have someone give you a successful and lucrative hat selling business where you’re time input is 10 hours a week and you make 5 times what you would need to live a comfortable life. A team of A-players, resources and logistics are already in place and flowing.
B. Start your hat selling business from scratch with no previous experience in the business and no contacts, processes or resources.
You’re passionate about the business in both scenarios. Which one would you choose?
It’s safe to say most people would easily choose A.
It seems to be the obvious choice or opportunity, safety and financial wealth while pursuing your interests and passions.
In small undertakings, many of us will choose the easy road.
As humans, we tend to place a higher sense of worthiness to larger goals. When it comes to life purpose, we want to select a goal that is worthy enough to dedicate our lives to. We want a partner that is worthy enough of marriage. A challenge that is worthy enough of effort.
We come up with a brilliant idea then we think of extravagant ways to execute it. We make this goal “worthy” of our attention and hard work.
Let’s go back to selling hats.
Your initial idea about a hat store, becomes a place that customizes the hats based on a person’s interests and physical dimensions. Now you imagine stores all over the world that carry these specialized hats!
You’re super excited for the possibilities!
You continue to imagine the hell out of it, then get overwhelmed and push this great idea off – indefinitely.
Usually, a mix of factors involving fear will paralyze you from realizing your dream. Your brain, which is designed to ensure your safety and survival will attach feelings of pain to this goal! Your mind will look for all the reasons why it’s not safe – designed to help you prepare and ensure your safety.
The sheer magnitude of this step can be so daunting.
How?
Easy wins.
Easy wins are usually bypassed by the mind as not being interesting or worthy enough to accomplish.
A sense of satisfaction happens when we stretch or grow in order to accomplish something. How many times have you been proud that you accomplished getting dressed and driving to work in the morning? Or that you practice good hygiene? With some exceptions, good hygiene is a basic given in life that we do and don’t really get great life satisfaction out of it.
There are things in our life that are we are used to and will not cause a great amount of life satisfaction from their accomplishment.
Such as walking around the block. Not much to boast about. How about running your first marathon?
This is due to hedonic adaptation. Hedonic adaptation is the tendency to quickly return to a relatively stable level of happiness despite major recent positive or negative events or life changes. This means you will start adapting to your accomplishments and they no longer cause the pleasure or satisfaction that they used to.
The body also gets used to strength and resistance training. This is known as progressive resistance – where overloading the muscles is constantly increased to build muscle and strength. What was once “heavy” is now “normal”.
Point is, the human being is designed to constantly strive and grow to “succeed”.
…[E]xercise is a wonderful example, where there’s something so satisfactory about the pain we get sometimes from trying to accomplish something, training for a marathon. And if it was effortless, it was painless, I don’t think we would get the same pleasure from it. I think that it illustrates that one critical ingredient here is control. So when it comes to pain, we could experience all sorts of pain – spicy foods, training for a marathon, a horror movie – but it’s critical that we control the intensity of the pain. Pain is never pleasurable when it’s out of your hands, when someone else is inflicting it. We are not wired up to enjoy pain under those circumstances.
– https://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=128721732
In Earl Nightingale’s seminal classic, The Strangest Secret he defines success as ‘”The gradual realization of a worthy goal.“
What is worthy?
A measure of value or worth is compared to demand, supply and relativity of the environment. The ratio of a thing as compared to its environment. The importance, usefulness, worth of a thing to the one measuring the value.
The more we assign value or worth to the goal, the more we think we need to work for, suffer for or train for to accomplish it. That struggle and sacrifice increase its worthiness. That struggle and sacrifice is what we get satisfaction from and what we associate success with.
Human biology is made to adapt and respond to demands that are placed upon it. The stronger the demand, the stronger the response. It evolves and grows based on the frequency and intensity of use.
Once a big pain response occurs, the brain creates an increase in resistance to executing the same (or similar) challenging element again. The more failure, the more it reinforces its resistance to it.
The easy win creates the reinforcing idea in the brain of accomplishment.
It creates baby steps to building self-confidence. Self-satisfaction. Self-belief. The feasibility of success improves.
Dopamine is released when you receive a reward through food, success or otherwise. The dopamine release helps with reinforcement of the activity that produced the feel-good dopamine release. The dopamine release also helps the brain focus, in order to attain more of what caused the previous dopamine release.
So, now you’re starting to associate pleasure with the achievement of your goals. You’re getting used to accomplish your goals and your biology is supporting pleasure and focus.
When you are taking smaller steps there is less consequence in testing, pivoting, and improving. You have more opportunities for testing without devastating consequences.
Through the easy win you begin to familiarize yourself with your “big worthy goal” one step at a time, until it feels like it’s possible.
A series of easy wins build a bridge to BIG dreams. Something that seemed so far away before, now feels like it could happen.
You get used to executing the idea. You build a routine and habits around it.
You can build upon it. Brick by brick.
Leveraging the easy win can sometimes feel like it’s “beneath you” or not worthy enough of your time.
However, it’s a calculated and streamlined way to grow as a person, to reach our goals one step at a time, to stretch and grow while building confidence and to feel successful and fulfilled.
Share your experience with incorporating the “easy win” into your success strategy below!
References:
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